Apollo Investment Management

Computer haiku

These are on a separate page because they do not really fit into our chosen speciality of financial poetry & doggerel - but they amuse me, and the time lost to computer crashes is certainly an economic factor. I would love to credit the author(s), but received the anonymous haiku by e-mail in November 2002, complete with this introduction:

In Japan, they have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with Haiku poetry messages. Haiku has strict construction rules. Each poem has only 17 syllables; 5 syllables in the first line, 7 in the second, and 5 in the third. They are used to communicate timeless messages, often achieving a wistful, yearning and powerful insight through extreme brevity. Instead of making you want to throw your computer out the window, they have a calming effect. For example:

The Web site you seek
Cannot be located, but
Countless more exist.

Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.

Program aborting:
Close all that you have worked on.
You ask far too much.

Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.

Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.

Your file was so big.
It must have been quite useful.
But now it is gone.

Stay the patient course.
Of little worth is your ire.
The network is down.

A crash reduces
Your expensive computer
To a simple stone.

Three things are certain:
Death, taxes and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.

You step in the stream,
But the water has moved on.
This page is not here.

Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.

Having been erased,
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped.

Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. All is blank


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